Lucky

Lucky - having or marked by good fortune.

The other day I posted this picture to Instagram with a caption that read - I don't consider myself lucky. Maybe I'm just keeping the bad luck away.

I wanna retract that statement.

I am lucky. Good things don't necessarily happen to me, but neither do bad things. I have been very fortunate that my family is healthy. I have lost one grandfather, two uncles, and one man that was very special to my family. Everyone else is still living. That's kind of rare. And while my relationship with Damion isn't like the ones you read about on Facebook, at least we're together. That's actually saying a lot given the circumstances and the fact that most of Madison & Emma-Leigh's friends have broken families. My parents are still together - and for that I feel very lucky. We may not have a ton of money to do an excess amount of "fun" stuff (like you read about on Facebook) but my girls still have everything they need and want, still get to do most everything they want to do, and for that, they are lucky. And though we all have busy schedules and I barely see any of them, I still have friends. Some pretty good ones. That's lucky. And when I can start out my Monday morning with this smiling face ~

Then we're ALL extremely lucky!

These wheels are turnin'

You can always count on me to blog when I'm in a funk. What does that tell ya? There's a lot on my mind today. For starters, I'm not feeling this concert that my daughter is going to next Friday night. She's so excited. It's her first concert. It's Tyga. In Knoxville. By herself. Well, except for her friend, Emily. I know what can happen at concerts...and I'm not crazy about him. or his lyrics. But I'm letting her go... Also on my mind is the fact that I'm still sitting in this same chair. Day after day, year after year (13) doing the same thing. I love my job, I really do. I like the people I work with, like all the crazy patients (for the most part), but I can't help but wonder what it would be like outside this log cabin. I can do more. I am fully capable. I can get the same flexibility elsewhere. I can get more pay. I can feel more appreciated. But he knows I won't do it. I'm good at it. I know what I'm doing. I'm comfortable. And I hate change. So I'll just sit here and be quiet. I've had quite a bit of time here lately to think. That is never good for me. I've decided that when I try to be a good friend it never really works out. I care too much, do too much. The only person that actually does anything for me are my parents. Which I guess is the way it's supposed to be. When you get older you don't really have many friends anyway. Not sure what I expect of people - too much, obviously.