I'm in a bit of a funk. I don't like today. I don't like the way I feel. I don't like it that this day seems to c r e e p by.
I had another bad morning with Madison. REALLY. BAD. My eyes hurt from all the tears I've cried - I could shut them right now and drift off to sleep. She's so disrespectful. So mean. I think I'm trying too hard. I don't back off when she isn't in the mood to talk. That is the problem. We don't get enough mommy & Madison time. That is another problem. When I talk to her, she will not look at me. For me, that's a problem. I have talked to a few people today about this and they've all said the same thing - it's her age, her hormones. I just feel like she doesn't care - which makes me angry and as you all know, I am NOT good at holding in my anger. So when she got out of the car this morning, nice words were not said. I cried the whole way to work. This is my baby. The one person that changed my life forever when I was just 19. She's the reason I am where I am. She's the reason I'm on this earth at all. Well, one of the reasons anyway. I'm just in a lot of pain and suffering today and I feel like it won't go away.
Another reason I'm in a funk - work is extremely S L O W. Dr. Travis is in Texas and it is way too quiet around here. Nevermind the fact that I can't chat to the new girl. Well, I can but I don't want to. That's another issue all by itself.
Tonight is Open House at Cane Creek @ 5:30pm and then Madison has tumbling @ 6:30pm - I don't know how we're gonna do it. Damion is in Charlotte for some kind of building symposium and may or may not make it back in time to help out.
This weekend I am hoping to go to Papas and Beer for dinner because if I don't I will cry even more. I'm craving it! Saturday is Ethan's birthday and we will be attending his birthday bash at his house :) then Saturday night we will go to the fair again. Only because it is to kinda celebrate Kaleb's bday and Brandon has free tickets for us all.
I am looking forward to next weekend though. Carowinds with Tiff and our girls!! Yipee!!
Awww keep your chin up! I think if we all sit and think back to somewhere around that age we all went through our own stages that drove our mother's to the edge. Just breathe!
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